When Anxiety About Having the Conversation is Worse than Having the Conversation Itself

Have you ever felt so misunderstood and frustrated by someone in your life that you simply stopped communicating with them? Have things ever improved from there?

Often the point at which conversation halts is exactly the point at which it should really continue. It can mean it's time to listen more, and speak less, but closing the proverbial door altogether is seldom justified.

I mediated a case recently where the parties on both sides had constructed elaborate narratives to justify why each was a terrible human being. In reality, each side felt grossly misunderstood despite all parties trying to act with good intentions. It just wasn't a good fit.

Together, we quickly discovered that all everyone wanted was to be able to walk away from the situation and make a clean break. Easy enough. Once we determined that, the terms practically wrote themselves, and we had a signed agreement. Instead of expensive, ongoing litigation, everyone was able to walk away with a tidy, fair resolution, and emotional closure to a situation that had dragged on for three years.